Saturday, October 5, 2013


This is what happens when I come up with my own marketing plans...

Remember a few weeks ago, when I was like, "Hey guys, let's write a bio for this sock puppet author!" and everyone was like *crickets*?  Remember that?

I sound disappointed, but I'm not. So what if nobody was willing to do my homework for me?  I'd have never learned my marketing lesson that way.  So, after about a million mental drafts...

Lexi Wood came to life!


LEXI WOOD is a sock puppet who came to life one night while her keeper was out picking up Chinese food. When nobody’s around, she bashes her face against a typewriter until stories come out. And those stories are shocking.

Lexi’s exterior is 53% acrylic, 37% nylon, and 10% recycled tinsel. On the inside, she’s full of bloodlust, wanderlust, lust-lust, bathtub gin, and pills she found on the floor. She also got into those tranquilizers you give your cat to get it in the travel carrier. You shouldn’t leave those things lying around.

Handmade in Vulgaria.

When she’s feeling dirty, Lexi likes to be held in soapy water and rubbed vigorously. In her spare time, she sits on the shelf, waiting for someone to shove a fist in her hole. Dance for Daddy, Salome is her first novella.

Who would? Lexi Wood!

Interview with Lexi Wood

Tomorrow I'll post more info about Dance for Daddy, Salome on Lexi's behalf (since she doesn't have a blog of her own, the lazy bitch).

And, since my own taboo titles were banned by Amazon this summer, I'm somewhat irritated to tell you Lexi's disgusting Daddy book slipped past the Amazon censors (who are, apparently, cracking down on exactly this sort of stepcest erotica):

Or check it out at one of these retailers:

eXcessica EDEN:

Barnes & Noble:


All Romance:



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