Your Nail Polish Isn't Supposed to Match Your Hair?

Call me the Giver of Bad Gifts. I don't mind. I know it's true.

I love buying things for my girl--little things, big things, gestures, necessities. I can recall buying Sweet everything from jewellery to light bulbs. In the end, I just want to make her smile and feel appreciated, feel special. I want to show her she has a girlfriend who listens when she says something like, "Damn, the little lightbulb in my fridge just burnt out."

Here's the problem with the whole gift-giving situation: I have really bad taste. I'm talking super-craptacular taste in fashion. I don't have an eye for that stuff. I don't care what I look like. I'll wear clothes full of holes as long as they're comfortable--it really makes no difference to me. I don't wear makeup except by force, and I don't know a thing about colour co-ordination and all that. I don't even know how to put on eye shadow, despite having watched Sweet do it a hundred time. When it comes to fashion, style, and cosmetics stuff, I'm an absolute dunce. Seriously.

And here's a little exchange to showcases my point:

Me: I picked you up a little something. Nail polish--that fancy brand you like.

Sweet (looking at the bottle): Oh... thanks..?

Me: I bought you this one because I figured it would match your hair colour.

Sweet (still looking at the bottle): O...kay... yeah, it does...

(long pause)

Me (finally clueing in): Nail polish isn't supposed to match your hair colour, is it?

Sweet: Uhhmmm... no.

The sucky thing is that I try. I really do. When I picked out that nail polish for Sweet, I put a lot of thought into my choice. I lined up a bunch of different colours, I narrowed my selection down, looked at them from different angles. There was solid reasoning behind my pick, but...just... fail. Epic fail.

Sometimes I feel like a typical run-of-the-mill "dumb guy"--the kind of guy women tear to shreds because they're just so stupid and "Why don't they get it?" and "It's really not all that complicated." But you know what? Arbitrary fashion rules (and other rules) are complicated when you don't know what you're doing. My intentions are totally there, but I just don't understand a lot of the things my girlfriend likes well enough to go out and purchase something awesome for her. I fail epically every time I try to give her something fashionable.

But I'm learning. Slowly. Slowly like... soil erosion... In the meantime, it sucks to be so off-base. Oh well. The thought's there, and I know I get points for effort. (And points=sex stuff, so I really can't complain LOL)

Hugs,

Giselle

Quick Six TNG with Desmond Haas

Sorry I'm a little late getting today's Quick Six TNG up. I was side-tracked by the federal election here in Canada. Looks like 4 more years of Helmet-Head the Automaton, but at least we've finally elected the leader of the Green Party into parliament. Maybe she will actually get to speak the next time there's a debate!

Anyway, enough with Canadian politics (though they are a blast). Here's your Quick Six with Desmond Haas!

1. What does "vanilla" mean to you?

When I think of Vanilla, I think of an excellent spice, used in cooking and desserts. I also think of heterosexual, missionary sex.

2. Is there any moment from your life that you remember in slow motion?

One moment I still have etched deep within me is the birth of my son, 18 years ago, and the events immediately after, especially when his eyes connected with mine.

3. What's the most unsettling movie you've ever seen?

The first Aliens movie unsettled me. Since then, I haven't been emotionally challenged by a movie.

4. If you had to get a tattoo on your face, what would you want it to look like?

In small print: You're inside my personal space.

5. How many monkeys jumping on the bed?

Seven, the other five are in the kitchen making me dinner.

6. Which of the books or stories you've written is your favourite?

My favorite book, so far, is Moving Forward (Amazon: http://rrn.me/gDq0rz).


Blurb:
Amanda Cooper, scarred from burns received in a car accident, runs into her high school sweetheart, while vacationing in the Bahamas. She keeps him at arms length, not ready to open herself to any intimacy because of her history of failed relationships and also because of her disfigurement. Eric, however, wants to rekindle what they once had.ten years ago.

Meanwhile, someone has been sending her threatening letters, telling her to burn in Hell. Will she escape whoever is stalking her and will Eric convince her he sees her beauty beyond the scars?

Excerpt:
He swerved to avoid the car coming at him, lost control, skidded back into his lane and side-swiped another car, sending their car careening back across the pavement, spinning out of control. Amanda saw the lights looming beyond Jeffrey’s head a split second before the pickup truck hit the side of the car.

She opened her eyes and brought her hand to her forehead, wiping whatever was dripping into her eyes. Pulling her hand down, she looked and saw her fingers covered in blood. The clicking of the cooling engine got her attention and she looked towards Jeffrey, he rolled his head back and forth.

Amanda heard a whoosh and saw the fireball bloom over the front of the car, the flames rushing at her through the broken windshield and fire seeping from under the dashboard. The flames grew quickly, leaping towards her. She screamed, first holding her hands over her face, then trying to brush the flames licking at her, trying to extinguish them. “Help me! Oh, God, please help me!” she cried.

She felt the heat and watched her dress melt onto her skin. Amanda screamed, now continuously, as she panicked and tried to remove her seatbelt, but failing to find the latch. She pulled at the belt across her chest and it locked tighter. The glass next to her head suddenly exploded inward, followed by a hand reaching for her. In her panic, she fought the hand and then her rescuer crawled partially through her window, undid her seat belt, dragging her back through the window and away from the car.

“Jeffrey…Get Jeffrey!” she yelled. Amanda heard him screaming, the car now fully engulfed in flames and then, mercifully, she heard only the sound of the fire.