March is an outstanding month for audio erotica. Five weeks of Fridays means that $4+ patrons get to listen to FIVE new stories!
If you're not yet a patron but you love audio erotica, you'll save a ton of money by subscribing to my Audio Erotica Patreon. Audiobooks are ridiculously expensive. That's one of the main reasons I wanted to set up a collection of audio content for patrons. It's sort of like a subscription service. Join up and listen to erotica written and read by me!
Coming up in March:
March 2, 2018: THE MESMERIST AND THE MARE
The Mesmerist and the Mare is a dreamy, hypnotic trip into Victorian repression. Sharp claws and ripped gowns. I love it.
March 9, 2018: BIKINIS AT THE BEACH
I wrote three brand new lesbian golden showers stories and wrapped them up in a little bundle called Lesbian Golden Showers. Bikinis at the Beach is, I would say, the "fun" one. Playful humiliation.
March 16, 2018: DIP IT
Older woman/younger man. Confession-style erotica. Cottage dreams. Sex in a lake. With someone you shouldn't be attracted to. Forbidden pleasures!
March 23, 2018: COULD HAVE BEEN ANY GIRL
Butch/femme stranger sex in public.
March 30, 2018: MY RELUCTANT SPANKDADDY
Older man, younger woman, shower sex and spanking.
Audio Erotica is for patrons only, so join up today! You'll get to listen to a nice cushy backlist of my stories, too!
For the past year or so, I've had this idea bouncing around my brain: an anthology of "Classic Giselle" erotica--stories I wrote at the very start of my career.
When I first started writing, there was only one person who believed in me: my grandma, of all people. I love grandmas who are cool with sex stuff. I love that I've got one. I knew that, when I released my Classic Giselle anthology, it should somehow honour my grandma.
If you follow me on twitter, you probably know by now that my grandmother's been in hospital for nearly a month.
When she was admitted, she was delirious. She's got a number of infections and she's not doing great.
I don't know how things'll turn out in the end, but I decided now is the right time to honour my grandma with an anthology of classic erotica. It's actually a lot of fun. My grandma's pretty hilarious. She wouldn't want a book made in her honour to be all depressing.
Thing is, I've also been reflecting on how much I appreciate my readers. With Valentine's Day coming up, I figured this book would make a nice thank you gift. So, from now until February 14 2018, the ebook is absolutely free at stores like Kobo, iTunes, Smashwords, BN and eXcitica.
After Valentine's Day, Classic Giselle will cost money. But, again in honour of my grandmother, I'll be donating all the royalties I earn from Classic Giselle throughout 2018 to the Canadian National Institute for the Blind (CNIB).
When my grandma's vision began to decrease due to macular degeneration, the CNIB was there for her every step of the way. And when I say they were there, I mean RIGHT THERE. In her house. People came in to teach her how to adapt to her changing vision.
My grandmother is now legally blind. She's always been a gadget geek, and the CNIB introduced her to accessibility technologies that have proven invaluable in navigating the world. And even tricks like how to pour yourself a glass of water when you can't see the water. Or the glass. They've done so much for her, and this is my way of acknowledging their help and care.
Classic Giselle is a double-whammy thank you. No, I'm wrong. It's a triple threat thank you. It's a thank you to readers for actually, you know, reading my words. It's a thank you to my grandma for believing in me. And it's a thank you to the CNIB for helping my grandma over the years.
It's been an exhausting couple weeks, but I'm so pleased to be able to give you this book of strange and silly stories. Free until Valentine's Day from the following ebook stores:
It's February, and you know what that means: an exciting month of audio erotica traveling from my mouth to your ears.
If you're not yet a patron, what are you waiting for? There's a $1 TIERfor those who'd like tolisten to a new audio erotica story the first Friday of every month, but if you want weekly audio erotica, you definitely want to get in at the $4+/month level!
Coming up in February:
February 2, 2018: TRYING ON MY ROOMMATE'S PANTIES (first-time lesbian erotica)
February 9, 2018: DIDGERIDOO ME (cock worship, group sex in a field, you know how it goes)
February 16, 2018: SATURDAY AT 5:30AM (adultery erotica)
February 23, 2018: FIGGING (if you don't know, I'm not telling you)
Audio Erotica is for patrons only, so join up today! You'll get to listen to a nice cushy backlist of my stories, too!
This book was not a mistake. It was simply... unexpected.
A lot of my recent ebook releases have been unexpected, lately. I'll tell you how they came about.
See, I've been recording audio versions of lots of my erotica shorts. I started out recording them for my Audio Erotica Patreon, but I thought, hey, I've got all this content. Why not release little audiobooks now that I have access to ACX and other audio distribution sources? Brilliant!
But here's the thing: many of my erotica shorts are... well, just that: short. Recorded, the shorter ones are only ten or twenty minutes long.
No problem, thought I. I'll package the shorter ones together, in threes. Three is such a great number for erotica, don't you think?
But once I'd created those audiobooks I thought... wait a minute... I can't upload these to ACX.
Why?
Because, in order to upload an audiobook via ACX, that book needs to be for sale at Amazon, either as an ebook or in print. To me, this is irritating. To Amazon, it makes perfect sense. They own everything, including ACX.
So that meant I needed to work backwards and create ebooks of my audiobooks, then upload the ebooks before I could upload the audiobooks!
Sometimes this job is very tiring.
Anyhoozle, I've been uploading these ebooks quietly in the background. I wasn't really thinking of them as books in their own rights, more like a means to an end. But, as it turns out, readers seem to be snapping up my little threesomes of stories. Who knew? Not I. I can never predict what will sell and what won't.
Today I've been uploading a little jewel called Being Bad: 3 Erotic Stories of Hot Sex in Public Places. The stories in this collection are just little quickies, but they are steamy and sassy and I think you'll love them, if you haven't read them already.
Best part about this fast little read is that it's a cheapie, only $0.99 a most vendors!
The audiobook hasn't been released yet, but you can get the ebook at:
I'm having the kind of day where I can barely cope with life.
I've told you before that comedy saves me when I'm depressed, but when I'm in this state? This beyond-depression "can't cope" state? This is when I turn to music.
If it wasn't for music, I don't know where I'd be right now.
Because I'm having such a shitty day, I was particularly elated when I saw that CBC is streaming Angry, the new album from Too Attached, this week.
This album is queer, concise, and fierce.
And you know what else? CBC lets you embed their streaming thingy right on your own site. Which means you can listen to Angry right here at Donuts and Desires. But it's only available to stream until February 2nd 2018, so listen now!
Just a quick heads-up that my first-time lesbian story TRYING ON MY ROOMMATE'S PANTIES is now available as an audiobook. If you've got 25 minutes, I've got pussy-licking, two vibrators and anal play!
You can support me on Patreon, because TRYING ON MY ROOMMATE'S PANTIES is on the schedule for February 1st!
Ultimately, it is WAY cheaper to listen to my audio erotica through my Patreon than it is to buy expensive audiobooks. I hope you'll join me. If you love audio erotica, it's the place to be!
Who Framed Roger Rabbit? is one of the few movies I still have on VHS. When it came out, it pretty much changed my life. I loved cartoons when I was a kid (I wanted to be an animator) and the idea that humans and cartoon characters could co-exist... well, that just blew my mind.
Why am I telling you this? Not really sure, to be honest. Oh! Right. It was the disappearing-reappearing ink.
See, I used a distributor called Pronoun to distribute a couple books to Amazon. Pronoun closed down recently. That means those books needed to be re-published.
They're disappearing-reappearing books!
Well, now that they've reappeared, I'll let you know where they can be found:
Giselle’s Best Adultery Erotica: 10 Tales of Forbidden Love
Love is complicated. Sometimes the most passionate love affairs take place with partners who are strictly forbidden. Infidelity can be driven by mutual attraction, money, desire, want of attention or even sheer hatred. In this collection, read Giselle Renarde’s top ten favourite tales of adultery, hand-picked by the author. Whether the sex is angry or loving, spontaneous or carefully planned, the characters all have one thing in common: they’re sleeping with someone they shouldn’t—and it’shot as hell!
We've got another great month of audio erotica this January. If you're not yet a patron, please consider supporting me. I would really appreciate it. There's even a new $1 TIER for those who'd like tolisten to a new audio erotica story the first Friday of every month.
If you want weekly audio erotica, that's still available for $4+/month, and I invite everyone to sign up today!
Coming up in January:
January 5, 2018: THE GIRL ON YOUR SKIN (very relatable lesbian jealousy)
January 12, 2018: THE WAR AT HOME (a wife gets stuck in some bedsheets)
January 19, 2018: SAUCY CHEEKS (lesbian spanking in a restaurant bathroom)
January 26, 2018: COCK CAGE CONFESSION (I think this is the one where I did a terrible Southern accent oh god...)
Audio Erotica is for patrons only, so join up today! You'll get to listen to a nice cushy backlist of my stories, too!
A few weeks ago, I wrote about the comedy that helped me cope with depression this year. But if comedy helps me cope in times of numbness, music has saved me in times of torment. I don't know how I would survive without music. It speaks to my soul like no other art form.
I hear readers saying that a book has saved their life. That's never been my experience with books, although it is fulfilling to hear, as a writer. But music? Music has saved me again and again and again and again.
So I thought I'd share with you my favourite three albums that came out in 2017.
I'm not generally the kind of person who marks an album's release date on the calendar, but that's exactly what I did when I heard Cold Specks was coming out with new music in 2017. I was particularly excited when I heard she'd be showcasing her Somali-Canadian heritage. The day this album dropped, I signed into my Hoopla account to listen (thank you, Toronto Public Library!), and I wasn't disappointed.
This is music to sit with. It gets inside you. Ladan Hussein's voice is rich and mournful. Her music is glorious.
Oh, I'm a sucker for St. Vincent. Annie Clark is one of those artists you love for the music, and then you see her in concert and love her for the experience. Some of her songs are great when you hear them digitally, but then you witness an extended version live and that same song just blows you away.
Okay, so I haven't heard any of the songs from her new album LIVE, but fingers crossed I'll get that chance.
I was actually sitting in a Toronto Public Library location the first time I listened to Masseduction (which, in my head, I still call Mass Education), and I remember my initial thought was: I'm not too sure about this. heh. But I listened to it again. And again. And again. And then I couldn't stop. It had become a compulsion.
I'll be totally honest with you: when I first came up with the idea of writing a blog post about my three favourite albums of 2017, I only had two in mind and this wasn't one of them. But it belongs here (haha puns) because it's phenomenal. It's just that, when I had the idea to write this post, I hadn't listened to it yet.
Before The Signal went off the air, they played the opening track Open (I'm not even trying with the puns anymore, they're just happening), and it blew me away. I kept thinking, "Gee, I really should look into this San Fermin organization," but until I needed a third for this list... I never did.
Long story short, I spent an entire evening listening to Open in my kitchen, in a trance, holding my headphones and asking, "What does it mean? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN???" while simultaneously being very glad I live alone. Oh, hey, and try listening to the track called No Promises without flashing back to Anthems for a Seventeen Year-Old Girl!
If music means as much to you as it does to me, I hope you found the sound that speaks to you this year. Here's hoping we'll all find more music to love in the year ahead.
Hugs,
Giselle
I just had a genius idea for everyone who leaves gift-buying to the last second. Like maybe it's 7AM Christmas morning and you suddenly realize DAMN IT JANET, I didn't get a gift for my sister/daughter/husband/grandma/whoever! What do I do?
You buy an ebook as a gift!
Isn't that a great idea? Yeah, I know it is! It's such a great idea I can't even believe I came up with it!
How do you give an ebook as a gift?
Certain retailers, like Amazon and Smashwords, give you this option. Just go to an ebook's page, look where the price is, and then scroll down until you see the button that says "Give as a Gift." Voila! It'll be delivered like magic. Instant gift!
What ebook should you give? Well, that's entirely up to you, my friend. Depends on what the recipient likes to read.
Here are a few ideas based on cursory perusal of Amazon. I haven't read any of these books, but now I definitely want to!
And, hey, if you want to give someone one of my books, you should definitely do that! Here's the newest, most expensive book I've published, which can be given as a gift via Smashwords. It's 6 novels in one book!
So there you go! All your problems are solved. You're welcome.
