Thursday, March 6, 2008

oldie-baldies are beautiful!

Have I ever mentioned how much I love the oldie-baldies?

I do. I love those physically fit bald men in the 50-65 age group. What can I say? I’m a grave robber (the opposite of a cradle robber…?)

And what’s not to love? Bald is the new leather. I love those shiny crowns, I love that short greying stubble that runs from ear to ear, and I love the vast expanse of foreheads. When I see a bald head in a crowd, I think, “Now there’s a man oozing with T!”

And I’m not talking shaved heads, here. A man’s got to be naturally bald to do it for me. Why? I guess because I associate male pattern baldness with increased testosterone levels, and increased testosterone levels with… well, happy thoughts…

Take Patrick Stewart: sexiest man alive, in my humble opinion. Just look at that picture. Oh, he’s so hot I can barely stand it. If I concentrate on that image for more than thirty seconds, my body erupts in spontaneous orgasm. He’s just that good-looking. (By the way, keep Patrick Stewart in mind while reading my Audrey and Lawrence stories. That’s who Lawrence’s looks are modelled on.)

So, to all you men out there who are thinning on top, I have only this to say: Don’t fight the hair loss! Wear your baldness with pride! Do it, if not for yourselves, then for me and the many other women out there who love to admire themselves in the sheen of a hairless scalp.

Power to the oldie-baldies!