Shopping vs. Sex?

I’m always hearing these ridiculous news items claiming that women prefer just about everything out there (chocolate, the internet, etc.) over sex. I don’t believe them for a second, but these stories just keep rearing their ugly heads.

Most recently, the radio news reported that more than half of all women would rather shop than have sex. Really? Who are these women and what kind of dolts are they sleeping with?

Perhaps it’s the stereotypical red-blooded dyke in me, but I admit that I absolutely hate shopping…except for groceries. What can I say? I love to eat! But for clothes and shoes and handbags and all that overpriced shit? Please! I’d rather be chained to the headboard for five days straight with my Sweet tracing her nails across my back than spend one hour at the mall.

I’m sure not everybody’s so extreme in their likes and dislikes, but really? Shopping over sex? Have we learned our lesson of not coveting thy neighbour’s wife so well that we’ve moved on to coveting thy neighbour’s cell phone and flat-screen TV?

Most people have far more stuff than their homes can handle (hence, the self-storage industry) and far more belongings that they can reasonably afford (hence, massive credit card debt). Do we really—really?—need to spend every moment of our valuable getting’-it-on time mall-hopping?

Save your money; have sex instead!

Happy Humping,
Giselle Renarde