For as long as I've been a published author, I've received two pieces of advice:
1. Get personal with readers. They want to know all about you, know you're a real person, hear about your life, etc.2. Don't tell readers about your life. It's dangerous, alienating, unprofessional, and generally TMI.**TMI=Too Much Information
I get where both sides are coming from, but I do what feels right for me--career-wise, and personally. I'm sure those who hold #2 as the Golden Rule would call me horribly rude, crude, and unprofessional, and that's their prerogative, but I like tweeting and blogging and chatting about my life. Even my sex life...because, hell, I write erotica for a living. Why not share my life experience, be it heavenly-erotic or earthy-amusing?
When the opportunity came along to contribute to Chrissie Bentley's new book The Bad Girl's Sweet Kiss: A blow-by-blow anthology of first time fellatio and other oral delights, I was beyond excited.
Are you familiar with the premise of this book? Here's the blurb:
A blow-by-blow anthology of first-time fellatio and other oral delights. Chrissie Bentley is a woman on a mission - to raise the profile of oral sex. In 'The Bad Girl's Sweet Kiss' she has brought together her own experiences as well as those of many other erotic writers from all over the world. From some of the most well-known voices in erotica to more recent newcomers to the field, everybody's first time is different. In this diverse collection of blow-by-blow accounts exploring an oft-overlooked act of intimacy, you'll find something to shock, titillate, amuse as well as trigger memories of your own oral initiation.
It's not just any old erotica antho. This one is full of true stories. Yes, it is! We authors share the stories of our first experiences with oral sex. For reals! If you'd like to hear the excruciating details of my first time giving a blow job, it's all there in black and white. I was brutally honest, just for you.
Well, for me too, I must admit. I like honesty. I would rather share the truth than hide behind the facade of lies. Maybe that's why I share so much about my life with readers: I'm not ashamed of my life's weirdness or queerness or un-normal-ness, and I hope my openness can encourage others to feel proud of who they are.
So, am I TMI? At times, yes, certainly. But if it doesn't bother you, it doesn't bother me.