Thursday, November 20, 2014

#FreeRead Wedding Heat: Friday (Yes, the ENTIRE series one box set!)

Today I'm taking a little break from telling you about my novel Seven Kisses (which comes out tomorrow, by the way!) to let you know you can now grab yourself a merry little copy of Wedding Heat: Friday (the series one box set) absolutely FREE!

The offer is available today and tomorrow only (that's November 20 and 21), so act fast!

This box set contains the first SIX stories in the wedding heat series.

Why am I giving it away such a high-value collection? To celebrate the fact that it's finally available in print!

And if a free ebook is more your style, booya:
US: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GFSK83U
UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00GFSK83U
CANADA: http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00GFSK83U
AUSTRALIA: http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B00GFSK83U

And to find out more about the series:  http://weddingheat.wordpress.com/stories-in-the-series/

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Okay, You've Waited Long Enough (Pre-order Seven Kisses for #99cents!)

I teased you earlier in the week with an undercover unreveal, where I only showed you the TEXT layer of the cover for my upcoming novel Seven Kisses. Today I'm showing you the whole shebang:

On my Mac, this cover appeared crisp and gorgeous. On this computer, it seems reaaaally dark... which, considering Seven Kisses is a dark romance, I guess I'll say was entirely deliberate. Can't see it at a glance? You've got to look closer. Take your time. Stare at it. I totally meant for that to happen. It's all part of my masterful marketing technique (HA!).

New news: Seven Kisses is now available for pre-order from Amazon for only $0.99. If you want this novel for $0.99, pre-order it NOW because, trust me, this price won't last:

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PSBSZIU
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00PSBSZIU

Monday, November 17, 2014

Undercover Unreveal: Seven Kisses

Everybody does a cover reveal when they've got a new book coming out. I'm original. I'm doing an UNDERcover UNreveal for my upcoming dark romance, Seven Kisses.

What does that mean?

It means today I'm only showing you the cover TEXT, not the IMAGE. Instead of an image, I'm just giving you white space. You'll have to wait until Wednesday to see the entire cover, pretty picture and all!

Coming Soon: A Cover Reveal!

Saturday, November 15, 2014

#MySexySaturday The Book Nobody's Ever Going To Buy

I blogged earlier in the week about how a cheating spouse is the taboo nobody wants to face in erotic fiction... and how my semi-autobiographical release "My First Christmas as a Married Man's Mistress" is the ever-unpopular adultery erotica. I wonder how long it'll be on the market before somebody actually buys a copy. Anybody taking bets?

Anyhoo, here are 7 paragraphs from the book nobody buys:
A mistress never plans for the holidays. There’s no one to kiss at the stroke of midnight, that mystical juncture between New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. She’s never treated to dinner on her birthday. Forget Valentine’s, too; utterly out of the question. Her heart is not warmed by fuzzy pyjamas and turkey at Christmas, unless she has friends or family to take her in.

But rarely does a mistress maintain close friendships, and often does she splinter from her family. Families like for their girls to grow into respectable women who marry and spawn. Not vixens. Not thieves. Families have no place of worth allocated to those of us who consort with the husbands of the respectable wives-and-mothers we ought to be. The image held of us as the good little girls, good little women, respectable members of society, is all at once destroyed. Disappointment infuses the gazes cast upon us. We are not what they wished for us to be…

Ah, but this is all becoming a touch too philosophical for my liking. At this rate, I may never begin my tale. And it’s a good one, too. You would be loath to miss it. As you are likely aware, if you are a reader of my work, I am far more interested in sex than philosophy. And that is precisely what this story will contain, as soon as I stop rambling about nonsense.

In fact, this is not just one story, but many stories, many little fictions fastened together by a larger fiction. The key element making this such a fascinating tale is that, while the little fictions are just that—thrilling little stories I wrote one Christmas as a special gift for my lover—the larger fiction is true. It is the tale of my lover’s gift to me, mine to him, and the gift we shared between us.

The aforementioned ‘little stories’ are what we refer to as ‘flash fiction’ in the trade. They are very short, like little flashes. I don’t like to think of them in relation to flashers; that is far too obscene for my taste. Flash fiction is like a splash of sunlight across a grey winter sky. It doesn’t last for long, but it cheers away that sadness we begin to feel as the days become shorter and the dark nights expand, along with our waistlines.

The flash, because of its conservancy of words, leaves a lasting impression on our hearts and minds. On our bodies too, I should hope, since the material flowing from my fountain pen is essentially pornography.

Before I begin my tale—and you see now how I am procrastinating, most likely out of fear that you will judge me harshly for consorting with a married person—I would like to share with you an example of a flash. This was the first in the compilation I mentioned earlier, the gift I gave to my brilliant lover. One always hesitates to give one’s writing to a man one considers brilliant, for fear he will laugh at its innocent stupidity, but it was for this reason my gift had such impact. It was something I created from my body, my heart and my mind, exclusively for him. And now I share it with you.

(...if you buy a copy mwahahahaha...)

Now Available from:
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/492105
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PGS5U06
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00PGS5U06
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id940112926
BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/my-first-christmas-as-a-married-mans-mistress-giselle-renarde/1120728872?ean=2940046315882&itm=1&usri=2940046315882
Scribd: https://www.scribd.com/book/246247770/My-First-Christmas-as-a-Married-Man-s-Mistress

Coming soon to other retailers

Friday, November 14, 2014

Monsters and Shifters and Men IN PRINT!

When you release a new book, it's smart to have the print version available right away. It's stupid to wait a month and then make the paperback available. As you know, I'm fond of doing stupid things, and so Monsters and Shifters and Men, Oh My! is now available in print (fourteen million years after the ebook came out):

Just can’t get enough? Monsters and Shifters and Men, Oh My! is full of spicy paranormal romances!

Inside you’ll find a princess in hiding, a forest full of shapeshifters and a faery with a secret. Curious about that mysterious man at the coffee shop? So are baristas Saada and Toby. Meanwhile, paranormal investigators Geoff and Anna are northward bound to search for the legendary Shadow People. And how will Artemis react when she encounters a cunning incubus who knows what he wants… and takes it?

Monsters and Shifters and Men, Oh My! includes:

Shadow People
The Regular
A Tale of Fur and Flesh
Monstrous Obsession
Secrets of the Solstice Sacrifice

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

My First Christmas as a Married Man's Mistress

You know what's a great idea? Writing an erotic romance about an adulterous relationship.

Just kidding! It's a stupid idea, unless you like throwing your time down the toilet. Nobody buys adultery erotica. I'm not counting hotwife/wife watching stuff, because yes I know that sells like hotcakes. That's what I SHOULD have written if I wanted to sell copies and make money.

But I didn't know that when I started writing back in 2006. I didn't know what the market wanted. I barely knew what the market WAS. I just wrote about what was going on in my life, and at that time my decade-long affair with a married man was spiraling to a close.

I spent a good portion of my adult existence as a married man's mistress, so why wouldn't I write about it? That's what I figured. I had no idea adultery was the new taboo (and not in a good way). I wrote an entire short story collection (Audrey and Lawrence) about that relationship. What a waste of time. For the record, I still love those stories... but that's just me.

"My First Christmas as a Married Man's Mistress" is another adultery-themed book I stupidly wrote. It was first published in 2010 by lyd Alterotica and, at that time, was titled "A Mistress' Christmas." The publisher folded last year, as I've mentioned here before, but I didn't rush right out to republish this one because... what's the point when nobody's gonna buy it?

How's that for a defeatist attitude? That's me. I love my work but I have zero confidence in my ability to sell it.

So that's my marketing spiel. (HA!)

"My First Christmas as a Married Man's Mistress" is available again as an ebook. It's nothing like most erotic romance out there, but you can say that about most of my work. You can count on me to be different. But this one.... this one is super-different:
Giselle knows how hard it is to find a good Christmas gift for a married man. She wants to give him everything, but where would he put it? Sometimes the best place to hide a secret is in plain sight…

“This is not just one story, but many stories, many little fictions fastened together by a larger tale of forbidden love. While the little fictions are just that—thrilling narratives I wrote one Christmas as a special gift for my lover—the larger fiction is true. It is the tale of my lover’s gift to me, mine to him, and the gift we shared between us.”

Originally published as A Mistress’ Christmas, My First Christmas as a Married Man’s Mistress is a strange and dreamy holiday trip through one young woman’s illicit love affair.

Now Available from:
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/492105
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PGS5U06
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00PGS5U06
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id940112926
BN: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/my-first-christmas-as-a-married-mans-mistress-giselle-renarde/1120728872?ean=2940046315882&itm=1&usri=2940046315882
Scribd: https://www.scribd.com/book/246247770/My-First-Christmas-as-a-Married-Man-s-Mistress

Also available from other retailers

Saturday, November 8, 2014

#MySexySaturday Shadow People

Earlier in the week, I posted about a new ebook called Shadow People. This novelette about paranormal investigators searching for legendary Inuit beings appears in Monsters and Shifters and Men, Oh My! so it's possible you've already read it. If not, I've arranged for Shadow People to be FREE at Amazon this weekend! No reason not to grab it!

But in case you're not convinced, here are seven paragraphs from the middle of their investigation, when Anna's boss Geoff is obviously having trust issues where their translator is concerned...

Trailing behind Tukkuttok, Geoff leaned in so close Anna could feel his breath on her ear. “It seems we’re being stonewalled.”

“Right,” Anna chuckled. “It’s a conspiracy of elders across three Arctic territories.”

“Keep your voice down.” Geoff grabbed her forearm as he gazed up ahead at their translator.

“What, you think Tukkuttok is altering the elders’ statements?” she whispered. “That doesn’t make sense. You were there. You saw their reactions.”

“Think about it: who set up all our meetings?”

“Tukkuttok,” Anna said.

At the mention of his name, their translator turned around. “Hey slowpokes, catch up will you?”

Oooh... intrigue! Read the whole story now!

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PA8RHU8
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00PA8RHU8

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Shadow People (now available as an e-book)


Once upon a time in the year of 2008, a story of mine called Shadow People appeared in an anthology called Bite Me! It was an anthology of MMF menage paranormal stories.

If you've been paying attention to this blog, you might have noticed I recently published my own anthology of MMF menage/multiple partner paranormal stories/novellas/novelettes called Monsters and Shifters and Men, Oh My! I included Shadow People in that book.

Maybe you've read it.

And maybe you haven't!

And if you haven't, I'm here to announce that Shadow People is now available as its own little ebook exclusively with Amazon. Why would I do such a thing? Because I'm counting on some of you/them/people/readers being Kindle Unlimited subscribers. If you are, that means you can borrow Shadow People for free!

I'll also mention I used Amazon's "Cover Creator" feature (which has been in Beta for the past 45 years) to make that particular cover. What can I say? I like playing with software while I watch TV.

Anyhoo, blah blah blah I talk too much. Here's the blurb and links:

Traditional stories tell of Inuit who have crossed into the shadow world. No one has ever returned…

Paranormal Investigator Anna Fairclough hasn't had much luck getting interesting assignments. When her boss, Gentle Geoff, picks her to investigate the existence of the elusive Inuit Shadow People, Anna jumps for joy. When he decides to come along for the trip, she's over the moon!

But when their attempts to find the legendary Shadow People fail at every turn, Geoff doesn't seem so gentle anymore. In fact, he blames Anna for their failure. Will the novice parapsychologist ever discover the secret of the Shadow People? And have rumours of their shyness been greatly exaggerated?

Author’s Note: Shadow People includes mature content not intended for readers under the age of eighteen. 

Amazon link: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PA8RHU8
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00PA8RHU8


Kindle Unlimited

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

October's Printacular Bookiness

Every month I post about the bestselling print books in my catalog and October surprised me greatly. The clear winner was My Mistress' Thighs, which is an anthology of transgender erotic fiction and poetry. The surprising bit is that it's not a new book (in fact, it's in its second edition) and it's never been a super-strong seller. But, yeah, in October it just took off. The paperback vastly outsold the rest of my books in print. Way to go, My Mistress' Thighs!

Erotic Transgender Fiction and Poetry
Rainbow Awards Honourable Mention

A cross-dressing cowboy, a post-war pin-up, and a wolf in grandmother's clothing all find a special home in My Mistress' Thighs.

This collection of erotic trans and genderqueer fiction makes room for everyone. There's a secret solstice sacrifice, a case of spring fever, an online romance, and a Wednesday night dinner routine that's anything but dull.

From the timid closet dresser of Love in the Time of Instant Messenger to the post-op rodeo queen of Leslie Goosemoon Rides Again, all who seek love find it in the world of Giselle Renarde Erotica. 


Available from a bunch of places (if you like buying paperbacks from your local bookstore, you can always ask them to order a copy).

I'll throw in some honourable mentions for October, because why not? Other popular titles included: Giselle's Big Box of BDSM, Forbidden Folk, Cherry, and Like It's 1999: Diary of a Teenager in Love with a Teacher.

Congratulations, books, on being bought!


Friday, October 31, 2014

#MySexySaturday Lesbian Gold (that's code for PEE!!!)

Last week it was monster menage. This week it's lesbian watersports!

The theme for My Sexy Saturday is "date night" and, in a weird way, my story Golden Showers with the Landlord's Daughter (which appears in my new mini-collection LESBIAN GOLD) fits the bill.  Not because these girls go out for dinner and a movie or take each other to the theatre. That's not their thing. Their thing is late-night pee parties in the basement.

How I envy them. It's not everybody's fetish, but I loves me some golden showers. Love 'em!

There are three short stories in LESBIAN GOLD. The following 7-paragraph excerpt comes from the last of them. Enjoy!

From "Golden Showers with the Landlord's Daughter" by Giselle Renarde:

For my second year at university, I moved out of residence dorms and into a townhouse near campus. The newspaper listing had said “basement apartment,” but that wasn’t entirely accurate, since my “apartment” didn’t have a bathroom in it. Really, I was renting a bedroom with a microwave. To use the bathroom, I had to climb two flights of stairs and share with my landlord’s daughter Emma.

I never felt comfortable going upstairs in the middle of the night. Usually, I was up late studying or writing papers, and I hated the idea of disturbing the family. They were nice people. I didn’t want to bother them by turning on lights and flushing toilets at two in the morning.

One day, not long after I’d moved in, I was moving furniture around when I accidentally flipped up the carpet in my room. There was no subflooring. They’d put the broadloom down on bare concrete, and right near the corner there was a drain. A drain! It was a circle about three or four inches across, with a metal grate over it. Even after I’d covered it back up, I kept thinking about it.

Later that night, after two cups of tea and a bottle of water, I felt that heaviness in my pelvis. I needed to pee. The family had obviously gone to bed—there were no footsteps or TV sounds coming from upstairs—and that drain under the carpet was looking pretty appealing. What difference did it make if I peed in the floor? A drain was a drain, right? Those pipes all went to the same place.

So I lifted the carpet and pushed down my pyjama pants, kicking them across the room. All I had to do was squat. The drain was in the perfect position for me to press my back against the wall, so I knew I wouldn’t fall over. I spread my legs wide, staring down at the drain. I’d never had to aim my stream before. I didn’t know if I could pull it off. Hopefully I wouldn’t spritz all over the carpet.

It took a couple seconds before I could let loose. The feeling of peeing without being on a toilet was really strange at first, but also exhilarating. I felt kind of dirty, kind of naughty, like I was doing something I shouldn’t be doing. And I guess I was. I don’t think the family would appreciate it if they knew I was peeing on their floor.

The drain became my late-night secret place. Every day I looked forward to using it the same way I used to look forward to getting myself off with my vibrator or my fingers. Sometimes after my stream died down, I would flick my clit, rub it around a little, bring myself to orgasm in no time. I have no idea what turned me on about crouching in the corner of my bedroom to pee, but my pussy was always super-wet by the time I’d finished. Often, if I fucked myself with my fingers, I could get myself to squirt even more liquid. It would spray all over my palm and drip down from my hand. I wondered if I was the only girl in the world who did things like this. I couldn’t imagine it was common...

Oh, forgot to mention: this weekend you can snag LESBIAN GOLD for only $0.99 at Amazon. Grab it now! Price goes up Monday. Grab the pee! Grab it!


Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/B00P2PMRDG?tag=dondes-20
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00P2PMRDG
Amazon Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/dp/B00P2PMRDG

LESBIAN GOLD will be available from other retailers, but we're not quite there yet.