Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Homes Away from Donuts

I'm special-guesting at two different sites today.

Did somebody say threesome?
Well, I'm not exactly a "special" guest at Flirty Author Bitches.  I'm actually a regular contributor to that blog (every 4th Tuesday, yo!).  Also, my post there today is totally ripped off from Donuts & Desires, but, hey, maybe you haven't read it: http://flirtyauthorbitches.com/2013/02/im-not-going-to-ask-who-wore-it-best/

The second guest appearance is the one I'm REALLY excited about.  It's an interview that features the sexy-assest Snape fan art I've ever seen. Visit for the sexy Snape, stay for the stuff about me: http://sexyreads.co.uk/interviews/what-is-sexy-to-giselle-renarde

That's all for now.
Happy Tuesday!

Monday, February 25, 2013

The Kink in Kinksters: In The Eye

I was thinking about this story today, because a girl on the bus reminded me of one of the characters.  Well, not the character herself--she reminded me of Susitna, a girl I went to grade school with. 

When I wrote In The Eye, my MMF tornado chaser menage, I named the "F" Susitna, after my school friend.  My friend's name was pronounced shoe-sheet-na.  We called her Shoe for short.  When I wrote In The Eye, I didn't want to explain the pronunciation so I had the guys call her Susi for short... but in my head, she's Shoe.

In The Eye was originally published as a Torquere Sip. After its contract expired, it was picked up by loveyoudivine as an ebook. Now it's also available in the Kinksters anthology I've been talking up over the past week.

Excerpt from In The Eye:

“No, I get it,” Susitna snapped.  Scooping up her King Charles spaniel, she rose to her feet. “Come on, Charlie. It’s a boy’s club. No girls allowed. What else is new?”
Dale stood to follow her out of the Grad commons, but Susitna surprised him by standing still. “It isn’t a boy’s club,” he said, even though there was only a narrow sense in which that was true. “Wait, you named a girl dog Charlie? Weird.”
“You’re not allowed to bring dogs in here,” Xu spat before Susitna could answer. People are allergic.”
“Are you allergic?” she shot back as the little dog licked her chin.
Xu looked down at the ping-pong table and rolled his eyes. “No.”
“Then shut up.” When Susi turned back to Dale, her expression softened. She was obviously willing to put up with Xu’s attitude only because she was so fond of Dale. “Are you allergic?”
Dale smiled at the care in her dark eyes, and shook his head. “No, I love dogs.”
Muttering something about dander, Xu gripped his ping-pong paddle and said, “Come on, Dale, stop wasting your time with this chick. We’ve got a game going, here.”
There was no taming Xu. He was rude to everybody until he learned to trust them. He’d learned to trust Dale long ago, which is probably why he held on so tight. But for Dale, there were other avenues to explore. Sure, he liked Xu. Loved him, even? But every instance of intimacy, whether sexual or not, seemed like just a moment in time. Nothing was set in stone.
“I’m sorry,” Dale said to Susitna. “I mean…maybe you can come.”
“Dale!” Xu hissed. Bouncing his ping-pong ball off the smooth green table, he whacked it so hard the little white sphere went soaring across the room. They all watched as it struck the ceiling before bouncing off the far wall and then plummeting to the floor. Charlie yapped like crazy and struggled to escape Susitna’s hold as the ball bounced up high a few times, and then rolled underneath the ping-pong table.
The dog kept barking, even as Susi shook her head and said, “Anyway…”
“You can’t come,” Xu said. “And it’s not because you’re a girl, it’s because you’re brown.”
Dale couldn’t believe his ears, but it was Susi’s jaw that dropped. After an eternal moment of disbelief, she threw her head back and laughed. “Fuck you!”
“Xu!” Dale snapped. “Seriously?”
“What?” Setting his paddle down on the table, Xu explained, “Bringing a brown girl along for the trip isn’t the best way to blend into the Midwestern United States.”
Susi set her dog down on the floor, pulling the leash tight so it couldn’t chase the forgotten ping-pong ball. “Oh yeah, like a Chinese boy’s going to blend in that much better.”
“I might not blend in, but at least I won’t get put on a terrorist watch list!”
“What the fuck are you talking about?  A, I was born in this country, and B, my family is Indian…and Hindu! It’s not like I’m a goddamn sleeper cell for Al Qaeda!”
Xu shook his head self-righteously. “Where we’re going, none of that matters. Brown is brown.”
“Okay, okay, okay!” Dale couldn’t bear another second of this ridiculous argument. “Cut it out, you two!”
To Dale’s surprise, they both shut their yaps and stared, wide-eyed, in his direction. He wasn’t sure what to say next. Dale had never been subjected to any kind of racism during their past trips to Tornado Alley, but as a blond-haired, blue-eyed white guy, he was hardly likely to be targeted. Xu might be right about small-town xenophobia, but Dale wasn’t about to turn Susitna away on account of her skin color. Anyway, he wanted her to come along on their trip.
“Xu,” he began, keeping cryptic in front of Susi. “Maybe it would be a good idea to let her come along…you know, to act as lookout and even do some driving when we’re getting close?”
Dale watched as Xu’s expression turned from irritated to intrigued. He kneeled down to pet her pooch. “You have a driver’s license? Are you a good driver?”
“Yes and yes,” she replied, glancing up at Dale. “You want me to drive into a tornado?”
“Possibly,” Dale admitted. “Very possibly.”
If you like a story with characters who challenge each other with brutal honesty, lots of comic repartee, and a few twists and turns (and tornadoes!) you might just enjoy In The Eye.

If you like threesomes, group sex, BDSM, and fetish erotica, Kinksters is for you!

Get Kinksters today from retailers like Amazon.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Boob Cupcakes

I thought I was pretty clever when I made these boob cupcakes for my sweetheart. No special occasion.  I just baked to say, "I love you."  They sure put a smile on her face. #totallyworthit

Is it cold in here?

Coffee, tea, or boobs?

Saturday, February 23, 2013

The Kink in Kinksters: Five Body Blade

Since its initial publication, the story of sword collector Miki's aspiration to fuck five men at once has been... well, a bit of a dark horse.  Now that it's been included in my new group sex anthology, Kinksters, I'm hoping it'll come into its own.

Five Body Blade has a definite focus on money, but (unlike all the billionaire books on the market today) it's the heroine who's got fistfuls of cash.  Five Body Blade begins with Miki purchasing the sword of her dreams at auction, then buying her toy boy Theo a fine meal.  She's got money to spare, and she kind of can't see beyond it.  Money solves all the world's problems.  In fact, when Theo is upset by the fact that she wants to pay five college boys (including Theo) to enact her fantasy of getting gang-banged in a sex swing, she can't fathom why he'd feel hurt.  After all, she's paying him so much money to do it!

Miki is a really awkward character.  She wants to be liked by this group of young black men, but she commands such high respect that her "five bodies" don't know quite how to interact with her.  They are split along gender lines (Miki is a woman, they are men), racial lines (Miki is Asian, they are black), economic lines (Miki is a billionaire, they are students), age lines (Miki is older, they are younger) to the point where all these guys can see is difference.  Miki, on the other hand, views people more as assets than individuals.  Sometimes you really want to smack her.  She knows what she wants and she gets it, but at what cost?

Excerpt from Five Body Blade:

“All right then, boys,” Miki called to the line-up.  “I hope you’re all good and hard because I’m choosing based on size and shape.  Jacquan!  You wanted to be in my ass?”
“Hell, yeah!” he cheered.
“And so you shall.  You’ve got the smallest cock of the bunch—perfect for rear entry.”
“Oh!” the guys teased.  “You’ve been told, man!”
“Darien,” she continued, taking his meat in her hand.  He breathed hard as she rubbed it.  “I like this curve; it reminds me of my sword.  And you’re wonderfully large.  I want this in my pussy.”
Lewis patted him on the back. “You’re good for something after all!”
“That leaves you and Ajay at my sides,” Miki said to Lewis. 
Their faces fell simultaneously. 
“Don’t be downhearted,” she said.  “You have perfect cocks for the task: they’re both long and straight, so when you come it will be on me and not my antiques.  At any rate, I give a decent enough hand job.”
“Good to hear,” Ajay said with a smile.
Rushing over to the low table, Jaquan looked up at Darien with alarm.  “Shit, man, I just realized your balls are going to be touching my balls!”
“Get a grip,” Lewis said.  “I’ve seen you two touch each others’ balls a hundred times.”
“Yeah, just like you’ve been sucking Ajay’s cock in the shower,” Darien shot back.  “We all know about you two.”
“Hey.” Ajay gave Darien a playful slap on the ass.  “How’d I get caught up in this?  I’m just standing here minding my own business.”
“All right, now,” Miki gently intervened.  Untying her halter dress, she let the loose fabric fall to the floor.  She was naked but for her stiletto heels, her body slim and pale but for the neat triangle of black hair.  Her breasts were small but proportional, with nipples so hard they could take someone’s eyes out.  It would take two Mikis to fill out one of Darien’s T-shirts.  Would she like him better than boring, lanky Theo?
“Let’s all get into position,” she commanded with feather-lightness.  “Darien, I want your thighs on top of Jaquan’s.  That’ll put you higher up.  I can take far more cock in my pussy than in my ass.  Sorry, Jacquan.”


So that's a taste of Miki.  She's trying.

You can read Five Body Blade today as an ebook, or by picking up your very own copy of Kinksters.

If you like threesomes and group sex, and you like BDSM and fetish erotica, Kinksters is for you (and even though the sticker price is higher, it'll save you money in the long run!)

Get Kinksters today from retailers like Amazon.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

I'm Not Going To Ask Who Wore It Best


I'd seen the cover of Xcite's "Pleasure Me" anthology a dozen times online before my physical contributor's copy arrived in the mail.  When I opened the envelope, I took one look at it and said, "Hey, wait a minute... I've seen this before."

So I went to my bookshelf and pulled out a copy of my novel "Anonymous" and, sure enough...

Am I right?  It's the same image!  Great minds, eh?

I won't ask who wore it best because I find those features awfully critical.  I'm partial to my novel because, well, it's allll miiiine, and it's been on the market since 2011 so I'm used to seeing it.

That said, "Anonymous" is an MMF menage novel and the cover doesn't exactly shout that fact...

Mind you, my story in "Pleasure Me" features two lesbian hotel workers watching a guest fuck a canteloupe...

Hmm... I forget where I was going with this... and I just remembered there's a canteloupe in my fridge.  Now I'm all confuzzled.

I'm going to cut myself off right about now, and say that you can get "Anonymous" at a discounted price if you buy it directly from the publisher, Amber Heat.  Just sayin'... http://www.amberquill.com/store/p/724-Anonymous.aspx

"Pleasure Me" is an Xcite anthology and you can scoop up a copy from Amazon:

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Stranded With The Professor

It's winter, so everybody wants to see characters get snowed in.  Good thing there's a new anthology from Ravenous Romance called (you guessed it) Snowed In!  It featured erotic romance stories wherein everybody's getting (that's right) snowed in--inside, outside, outside-down.

Mine takes place in a car, when a blizzard makes the highway impassable.  It's a gay first-time story--those are always popular, in my experience.  (Okay, all I really have to go on is "Skinny Dipping" from my Wedding Heat series. That's a gay first-time story and it sells like a mofo: http://weddingheat.wordpress.com/2012/07/26/sexcerpt-from-wedding-heat-3-skinny-dipping/ )

In "Stranded with the Professor," a college student and a stodgy professor get stuck.  The young guy tries to engage the professor, but the older dude is coming off a bad breakup and doesn't have much to say.  But, hey, sometimes actions speak louder than words... especially when you're keeping warm under a fresh pile of laundry.

Here's an excerpt from my story, "Stranded with the Professor":

Completely naked, Jacob buried himself in laundry, which was, amazingly, still warm from the dryer.  Max was somewhere behind him, but not touching.  The professor stretched a sheet and then a blanket over their bodies and the laundry pile, and Jacob felt the warmth trapped next to his skin, even as the coldness of night encroached through the windows.
“Closer,” Jacob said.
For the longest moment in the history of everything, Max didn’t move. 
And then he did.
“You won’t tell your parents…?”
Jacob smiled.  “I won’t tell them if you don’t tell them.  Whatever happens.”
Max drew closer.  His body heat met Jacob’s back, and then his skin did.  Chest to back, arms circling around, hard cock lodged between two very receptive ass cheeks.  Yes, thank you! Jacob couldn’t get over the mass of that erection, or the heat coming off of it.  The professor’s arousal encouraged his cock to grow big and thick.  God, he ached to touch it, but he was frozen in place. Couldn’t move a muscle.
“If I’ve been rude to you, I apologize.”  Max hugged Jacob hard, then planted a hot kiss at the crook of his neck.  That mustache tickled, but Jacob didn’t laugh.  “I’m not type to talk about my emotions, but I appreciate your compassion—more than you’ll ever know.”
Jacob warmed from the inside out.  “You can do anything you want to me.  I mean it.  Anything.”
A grizzly growl emerged from deep in Max’s throat.  He sieged Jacob’s neck with kisses, sweeping his mustache up its length and then down Jacob’s shoulder.  Was this really happening?  Jacob was about to lose his gay cherry to a professor from his very own school?  Never in a million years did he imagine this happening.
A hot hand met Jacob’s dick, and he gasped.  He seriously couldn’t believe how good this felt.  Nothing like touching himself.  Nothing like the rare occasions on which he’d been able to convince a girl to touch it.  Max’s hand was practised and sure.  It wrapped around Jacob’s erection like a serpent, then tightened, tightened, then stroked.  God, if he wasn’t careful he’d come before anything really happened.
“Feels good,” Jacob said, his throat clicking between the words.  “So good.”
Max didn’t say anything, but his staggered breath on Jacob’s shoulder said more than words ever could.  Jacob wondered if he should reach back and paw at the professor, but he felt nervous about that idea.  He didn’t know what he was doing, so he just let Max do all the heavy lifting.
The professor’s hand streaked up and down Jacob’s erection, and the rampant friction warmed his thighs and his belly.  If the plan was to generate heat, it was sure as hell working!

If you want to pick up a copy of Snowed In, it's available from Ravenous Romance: http://www.ravenousromance.com/anthologies/snowed-in.php

I didn't find it on Amazon, but I assume it's coming.
Happy Winter!

Monday, February 18, 2013

Kinksters: 10 stories of wild group sex, bisexual fun and kinky pleasures

~Update: KINKSTERS is currently in its second edition, with even more great stories! http://www.amazon.com/KINKSTERS-Stories-Group-Bisexual-Pleasures/dp/1495460258

For a couple years now, I've been toying with the idea of putting together a single-author anthology of kinky menage stories.  Finally, that idea has come to fruition, thanks to the lovely people at loveyoudivine Alterotica.  "Kinksters" is now available!

Kinksters: 10 stories of wild group sex, bisexual fun and kinky pleasures.

Kinky couples are great, but kinky groups are better!

In Giselle Renarde’s Kinksters anthology, a lesbian couple shares their anal fetish with a school friend, while a sword collector pays five young men to fulfill her sex-swing fantasy. A gorgeous restaurateur cheats with two men in one night. Three college kids take their tornado fetish on the road, and an Inuit woman faces the dreaded three-headed sea monster. There’s an all-girl waxing session, a vintage clothing enthusiast and her bisexual man candy, and a cougar with two male escorts who also happen to be angels. In Rainbow Night, three rich bitches trade husbands for an evening of cock-sucking, while a roomful of women squirt all over a tattooed beauty in Lesbukake.

Menage configurations include FFF, MMF, MFM, MFMFMF, MMFFM, MMFMMM, all-girl group sex, and more! Fetishes include voyeurism, anal, underwater sex, cheating, coercion, sex for money, waxing, age gap, lipstick, clothing, swapping, squirting, wife-watching, and tattoos!

Includes previously published titles Elementary, My Dear Kathryn, Five Body Blade, In the Eye, Beneath the Ice, and Waxing is for Pussies.

(btw, I did the math and if you were to buy those 5 ebooks individually, they'd cost you $10.99.  In Kinksters, you're getting the 5 stories mentioned about, 5 more kinky group sex stories, and the retail price of the ebook is only $8.99!)

Excerpt: From “Elementary, My Dear Kathryn”

Melanie’s pussy throbbed.

The juice of her arousal slicked the gusset of her panties. Her clit pounded so hard against the seam of her slacks she could have sworn she was growing a stiff cock in there. God, this was too much. Kathryn was getting all the attention tonight, and in a lot of ways, that was torture.

“My dear Kathryn, you have a beautiful asshole.” Pasha’s honey voice violated Melanie’s sensibilities, but she reminded herself jealousy wasn’t worth her time. “Roll onto your back, will you, so I can get a better view of your pussy?”

At first, Kathryn did nothing. When she did move, it was to gaze at Melanie, perched beside Pasha. Melanie knew that look. Kathryn was seeking permission. It was sort of sweet, actually. With an instant smile, Melanie nodded. Only then did Kathryn ease up on all fours like a dog with its tail between its legs, settling cautiously in front of Pasha.

Melanie couldn’t stop eyeing Kathryn’s tits. Those little nipples played hide-and-seek as she breathed, rising just above the top of her exposed bra before ducking inside the cups. When Pasha urged her to raise her hips, her breasts swelled out and, God, did Melanie ever want to suck those little nipples.

“Not yet,” Pasha instructed, always the mind-reader. “I want you to watch what I do to our dear Kathryn. You will learn, my girl.”

My girrel.

Melanie nodded, even though Pasha’s gaze was focused squarely on Kathryn’s cunt. She pierced that begging slit—three fat fingers all in one go—and Kathryn bucked her hips even higher, squealing. Melanie could only imagine the intense sensation…and, God, did she imagine!

“You see what I do?” Pasha asked as she pulled her fingers from between Kathryn’s swollen lips.

Melanie felt like the host of a talk show, watching her celebrity chef guest prepare a delicacy. She kept thinking, ‘I know how to do this! I’m not stupid!’ and then forcing humility upon herself. Nobody was so clever they couldn’t learn something new. She watched as Pasha spread glistening juice all over Kathryn’s ass crack. It was beautiful, the way Kathryn moaned and writhed on the bed while Pasha rubbed there.

“A clean asshole is a wonderful thing,” Pasha said as she poked a fingertip inside, turning it like a corkscrew. She didn’t wait long before pressing a second one in, turning her hand, spreading her fingers to pry open that tight hole. It really was an amazing thing to watch.

Pasha dug in deeper, forcing past the resistance. She was so wet, so damn wet that her raised cunt dripped juice down to ease Pasha’s way. When Pasha’s fingers were buried to the hilt inside Kathryn’s tight little hole, she turned her head and nodded. Melanie knew what that meant, and she hopped right up on the bed...


Kinksters is available from all the usual places, including Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Kinksters-Complete-Digital-Edition-ebook/dp/B00BFWXTKK/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1360908244&sr=8-4&keywords=kinksters

Barnes&Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/kinksters-giselle-renarde/1114565486?ean=2940016369679

All Romance eBooks: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-kinksterscompletedigitaleditionmmffffmfm-1060314-146.html

Friday, February 15, 2013

Swept Away Blog Hop Stop: My Big Fat Fail of a Valentine's Day

Welcome to the Giselle Renarde stop on the Swept Away Valentine's Blog Hop!

Let's start with the good stuff: what you get.  I'm not giving a free ebook to one lucky reader, or even two or three.  Nope.  I'm giving a free ebook to EVERY visitor.

The easiest way to do this is make the book FREE at All Romance ebooks for the duration of the hop, so that's exactly what I've done.  If you hippity-hop over to ARe, you can pick up your free copy of my shapeshifter fairy tale (based on the Brothers Grimm story Allerleirauh), A Tale of Fur and Flesh: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-ataleoffurandflesh-625148-142.html

Now on to the big fat fail portion of my post.

My Valentine's Day began to big-fat-fail LAST YEAR (it started early!), when I bought an opera subscription with my mother and let her pick the dates.  Sure enough, she got us tickets to Tristan und Isolde (a 5-hour opera, if you're not familiar with it) for Valentine's Day.

I have a sweetheart in my life, as many of you know. Sweet and I have been together nearly 5 years, and, fortunately, we're both pretty anti-V-Day.  The commercialism of Valentine's Day bugs the hell out of her, even more than it bothers me--and I didn't think that was possible.  So we never celebrate by going out or buying each other gifts.

But I figured, since I was meeting my mother downtown, I would buy a cupcake from Mom's favourite little cupcake shop.  My mom doesn't have anyone special in her life, romance-wise, so I thought that it would be a nice gesture.

Well, I got to the cupcake shop and it was PACKED.  They were so busy they actually had a security guard on duty to corral the crowds.  There must have been 30 people in line when I overheard from someone on staff that there were only 7 cupcakes left.

Okay. So, screw that idea.

I thought I'd buy my mom some gourmet tea to help her get over the cold she's had for a week.  I went to the specialty tea place, but guess what?  Sold out.  Of course!

So I met my mom giftless, not that she minded.  Here's the thing: once we took our seats and the Canadian Opera Company's production of Tristan und Isolde kicked up, we realized... wow... we really could have used the sugar from that cupcake I couldn't get.


I LOVE opera.  I love classical music.  I love theatre.  I have never in my life walked out on anything.  But I did walk out on this.

I have never seen such a dismally lacklustre opera production.  No sets beyond a black box. Basic black costumes.  Instead of giving us something great to watch while these performers sang their asses off for 5 hours, they gave us a huge movie screen broadcasting some art school crap.  Oh my god, SO MUCH GRATUITOUS NUDITY!  And, hello, I write smut for a living.  When I complain that your opera has too much nudity in it (especially when I'm sitting next to my mother watching it), that says something.

I wish I could do a better job describing to you how terrible this production was, but it killed so many of my brain cells that I can barely form sentences right now.  Thank god we left after the second act or I'd be a zombie right now.

Oh, and speaking of zombies, my mother kept falling asleep during this opera... and my mother makes movie monster noises in her sleep... so every 10 minutes or so I heard moaning beside me and I had to jab her in the ribs to wake her up.

Happy Valentine's Day to me!

So I came home to my girl (on the phone, not in person--we're a long distance couple unless she's working in the city) and after a big fat day of failure... awwww.... just the sound of her voice made the fail go away.

Which is what happens every time I hear her voice.  My sweetheart makes life's big fat fails all melt away.


Hope your V-Day was full of awww...

And if it wasn't, here's a free book: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-ataleoffurandflesh-625148-142.html


Oh, and guess what? For the kinksters in the crowd, I've got a new book hitting the market TODAY. It's called Kinksters: 10 stories of wild group sex, bisexual fun and kinky pleasures!  Check it out at Amazon: