Thursday, January 13, 2011

What's Your Crush Type?

I used to know, but I don't anymore.

Fifteen years ago I could predict exactly the type of person I would develop a crush on. I knew every last characteristic. That person would be:
  • Male
  • Healthy & Fit
  • Aged 48-60
  • Bald
  • Highly Intelligent/Academic
  • Refined Manners and Tastes
Think Patrick Stewart. Yeppers, that was the man for me. Every time a man like that crossed my path, I'd melt into a gooey puddle of crush-juice.

Ten years ago, I noticed a shift in my crushes. Bald men stopped turning my head. A different type of person started attracting my attention:
  • Female
  • Artsy/Quirky
  • Aged 18-30
  • Small in Stature
  • Eclectic Tastes
  • Dark Hair
My rockabilly babe, pin-up model Bernie Dexter, should give you some idea of the kind of girl I'm talking about.

Now...I just don't know anymore! I can't predict when a crush will come along and what she'll look like or act like. It's like there are absolutely no commonalities anymore, except that I haven't had a crush on a dude in a good long time (except Professor Snape...does he count?).

What is my "crush type"? I've been mulling this over for a couple days now and...I've got nothing!

I mean, I think about my girlfriend of two+ years, and she doesn't fit into any known category. Sweet's:
  • MTF Transsexual
  • Tall
  • Redhead
  • "Curvy"
  • Generous
  • Wise Woman
  • Geeky/Trekkie
  • Tells Really Bad Jokes
Mind you, I don't remember ever really having a crush on Sweet. I knew there was something special about her, and I fell in love. Or maybe I did have a crush on her...and maybe I still do. I certainly do find myself fantasizing about kissing her while I'm dozing on the subway. I still think about her all the time. Every time I'm in a store, I can't resist buying her a present, even if it's just a bottle of iced tea.

But that doesn't help me in establishing my crush type. When I think about the women I've crushed on over the past five years, I see no similarities. Maybe we only see the similarities in retrospect. Maybe five years from now, it'll all be clear.

What about you? Are there certain physical qualities you know you'll be attracted to in any given person? Or do the physical qualities have to accompany personality qualities? Can you clearly identify the kind of person you'll develop a crush on?

What's your crush type?

Bright Blessings,
Giselle Renarde
Canada just got hotter!


  1. 'They' are always saying that female sexuality is fluid, and I reckon they're right. Vaguely humanoid is my crush type, assuming there's some intellect and wit in there somewhere.

  2. Loki,

    Humanoid is okay...I guess...but "vaguely" is the key. I could really go for some kind of creature with tentacles. Lots of tentacles...with a bunch of little suction cups all over them...




  3. Judging by my 2 current crushes, I guess my type would be unusual, unique, and perhaps a bit daring, but absolutely feminine.

    I could listen Abby (from NCIS) ramble on about anything, no matter how disgusting or techie, just to see her pigtails sway, and to watch the light sparkle on the studs of her collar.

    At the same time, I would gladly sign up to buy insurance against dinosaurs coming back to life and crushing the boat I'll never own, just to have Flo (from the Progressive commercials) get all smiley and giddy with me. :)

  4. I'll never watch another Progressive commercial without thinking of you, Sally. (Is Progressive Insurance even available to us Canadians? Or do we just watch way too many syndicated sitcoms on Fox at 3am? Or is that just me?)